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The Mix: A chat thread for all members

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LoWiSa
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PostLoWiSa on Mon Sep 18, 2017 10:00 am

Lisa, these pictures are lovely! Mountains are beautiful as you and your daughter... I'm a bit jealous about the pool, I wish I would relax there too. Thank you for sharing your memories with us!

Thank you Anita and Suzanne for your nice words. You're right, I'm kinda busy living my own life you know, mostly existential problems, how to pay rent, and other things. I fight bravely and don't give up! I was talking about changes and good ends lately when Sam was worried about the moving. It also applies to me. I hope and pray for improving and good ends. But what is much worse is something different.

My male parent loses contact with reality. Throws all people away with his behavior, he's inventing lies, he's verbally aggresive to others. He's psychically abusing his relatives. He has paranoid and fictional ideas about people and the world. He is making assumptions and theories about everything. Hurts everyone around him, first my mom, then his daughters, my sister and I, then his second wife and her autistic children. It's driving me crazy... He's a selfish man, his ego goes up to heaven, he never heard about humiliation, I don't know if he even knows its meaning. Gratitude and willingness are unknow words for him. I barely heard him say please or thank you. Does not recognize communication. He only see himself and his interests...

In his eyes, I am the worst person at all, and he has not spoken to me for four years from when he threw me out of the house on the street in the middle of the night. It's worse every year. He does not even hide his behavior anymore. I do not know where all that anger is taking in him. I suspect some mental illness, for real. I don't want to be right, but I'm afraid I am. Borderline personality disorder is most likely. I do not dare say that it could be worse than this, for example, early psychosis. Symptoms are clear, unfortunatelly...

I wish I could help him. If anyone could help him. But he doesn't want to help. From anyone. He said it clearly and not just once. It makes the whole situation harder to handle. Seeing someone suffering and can't do nothing. It's very complicated...

I know I should forgive him for acting on me. All those years of humiliation. I've never been good enough. In nothing. Ever. All I've always heard is reproach, comparison with others, why can not I be as good as them. It's gone now, but it remarked me. I'll definitely do it once. but I can never forget, nor understand why...

God, I'm about to cry ... I need a big cup of coffee. Right Now. And chocolate! But I do not have any ...
Thank you that I could write it here and perhaps you read it. I feel a little better now. I'm really happy to have you and this forum. And sims. It has always been my escape from reality, among other things. Yesterday I uninstalled it completely. I had enough of eternal crashing, missing simmies, and family relationships. It needs a brand new beginning.






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Chicklet45368
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PostChicklet45368 on Mon Sep 18, 2017 1:57 pm

Tilly - Those holiday pics are wonderful! The resort looks absolutely fabulous and exotic and so very relaxing! And, you and your daughter look like sisters! LOL, so beautiful. You both look like you're very relaxed and having a great time!

Lowisa - Wow! What a terribly hard position you're in. It's never any fun to be treated like that, by anybody. But, especially by a parent! It does sound like he has some mental issues going on. Is there nobody close enough to him, that would be able to convince him to go to the doctor or get some kind of treatment?

*EDITED - Blonde moment! I said Anita, when I meant Tilly! What can I say, you're both so beautiful I got confused! LOL


Last edited by Chicklet45368 on Mon Sep 18, 2017 2:59 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Mon Sep 18, 2017 2:22 pm

I'm so sorry to hear this Anna..I don't know what to really say..except to just stand by just in case he does need/want the help..I found if they don't want help or they don't think they have a problem then there is nothing anyone can do until they are ready..thinking and praying for you and your family..

~~~~~~~~~~

I decided to call and see if it was to late to not take that house..and I was able to get another voucher..and extension..if feels like a heavy load has been lifted doing that..so waiting on a call back to get a ride to Jeff City to get this ball rolling again..Terry has an appointment Wednesday..he forgot to call his case manager for today..opps lol

At least Terry and I will be in the same apartment complex..I hope..

Another Hurricane headed this way again..Marie in less than an hour that I have been watching the weather channel went from a cat 3 to a cat 4..and headed to the US/British Virgin Islands..I am shocked there is anyone left on the Islands or even the Islands still there after Jose, and Irma..

Be safe everyone..



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

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anidup
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Postanidup on Mon Sep 18, 2017 2:47 pm

Anna, thank you for sharing your thoughts and troubles with us. I can imagine how hard it must be for you to be treated like that by a parent, and then to have to cope in the hard reality of real life with no one to assist you. I can say all kinds of things to you, but none might make you feel better. Hence I will only say that we are here for you, we will always have a tender ear for the troubles you might have.
I for one, has so much respect for you, to make a success of your life despite the hand life dealt you! And you know, sometimes I look at the Sims game as a tool to work through difficult moments in my life. Whether by playing or creating..... I am able to escape my real problems for a while, and sometimes it helps me in changing my perspective of the problem I have. I do hope that you will find inner peace .
I am looking forward to many more chats with you!

hugss



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Lorry
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PostLorry on Mon Sep 18, 2017 3:55 pm

Oh gosh sometimes this thread can be very upsetting, I just want to give you all a BIG hug.

I have heard talk of bringing in rent bidding here, and after what I have been reading, I definitely don't want it hmmm

Anna your comment really touched me, I am so sorry what you have been through. Verbal abuse is so damaging, I know because I have been a victim too.
You are good enough, and never forget that. consol1

Marie I am thinking of you, sending you lots of budhug

LISA welcomeflag home bighugs2

Oh my gosh I am so envious, your pictures are fabulous.




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LoWiSa
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PostLoWiSa on Mon Sep 18, 2017 5:55 pm

TJ, please call me Anna. I prefer it, it comes to me so much more friendly when we like that here :)

Well, there's nobody. He pushed everyone away. When he divorced with my mom and canceled every contact with us (me and my sister), he got married again. We thought he would be happy on his own, I know his new wife, she's my very good friend. She's kind, patient, loving mother and wife. But it turned out he just wanted her money from her previous marriage to renovate his house. When they run out of money, he started to be a person I described above.

He's a sociopath, he can very well pretend. She was forced to move out with her disabled children. Now she's a mess, without any saved penny. He does not want to help. At all. If anyone even tries to convience him to get help he starts to scream loudly and be physically aggressive, threatens to hurt any stranger who approaches his house. He might hurt someone, he's a big man. And he has a couple of knives and a shotgun and who knows what else.

You're right Sam, he does not think he has a problem, his ego will not let him. He lives on his own and avoid contact with the outside world. He lives in his own world. I do not know what he does and I do not really care. He's also collecting stuff around him and it makes me think; Most of you have heard about OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and its many forms ... All we have left is to have faith.

Anita, Lorry, thank you so much. Your kind words means a lot to me.
Thank you ladies. It makes me feel better if I talk about it with someone rose2

I hope everything to be allright with new house Sam. I'll keep my fingers crossed.
P.S.: I heard about another hurricane too. I hope everyone will be safe. . .






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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Mon Sep 18, 2017 6:47 pm

Anna, I have a daughter who is on that Meth..and she says she doesn't have a problem she can quit any time..well that happens for a month or 2 and then goes crazy and then back on it again..I have tried so many times to help her and get her help..but she just runs away..and hides..

So in some ways we are both going through a situation there is no ending until they are ready for it..and I mean really ready for it to stop..all it is now is waiting for that other shoe to drop and hope and pray for the best..

My sister has a prayer chain and if it is ok with you I will add you and your family to that..

hugss



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

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Friends call me Sam(F) or Broomy or Broomhilda
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alouette
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Postalouette on Mon Sep 18, 2017 7:57 pm

Lisa for some reason I missed that you were on holiday! It looks like you had a beautiful time. How are those babies of yours?

It looks like everyone is going through some rough patches, but I am thinking of you all. It males my heart happy to know we are all friends here and care to share our lives beyond the Sims.


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szanne7000
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Postszanne7000 on Tue Sep 19, 2017 4:11 am

Oh, what beautiful places you visited, Lisa! You and your daughter looked like you were having just the best time!

I lived in Big Bear, CA for several years... Driving up any of the 3 roads to get there was always -interesting- Yes, I'll say interesting :D I couldn't drive them today. I'm so happy you got to relax and enjoy life <3

~~~
Anna - HUGS, HUGS, and more HUGS!

While I'm sad he threw you out in the middle of the night, it certainly sounds like you are much better to be away from him. I know it is difficult/hard/terrible/painful - especially when it is a parent...

...my mother was bad and now that she has dementia, she is no longer responsible...

...healing from her has taken a very long time. I just want you to know you are a strong woman and you can get through this and past it. Do you skype? I'd love to talk if you would like to do so.

~~~
Sam, I'm still thinking really positive thoughts for you. I'm glad you were able to get an extension. Stay safe and dry with this crazy weather.



Thank you, Crissi, for my beautiful signature <3
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IvyRose
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PostIvyRose on Tue Sep 19, 2017 9:12 am

Your holiday pics are lovely Lisa, where did you go it looks so beautiful?



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Tahoe
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PostTahoe on Tue Sep 19, 2017 11:58 am

Sam: I wish that maybe I may dream of him, my son has done it and I'm a little jealous of him.
Lisa: Thank you very much. I understand it will take time. We chose not to get any more dogs when Zack lived when he did not like dog puppies, kittens or children, mostly he was not mean, but he thought they were too busy.
It's tough when someone related is suffering from something. My son's ex did it but he did not want to tell me how bad she was while they were together but he did then and my heart bleed for him and I became so pissed on her because she treated him like she did. I never thought so because when she was here she was always so nice but now I'm thinking about that, I see some signs.
My dad did not have any mental problems, but he drank alcohol and became a very naughty and violent person after a freak one day he screamed that I could move if it did not fit me (that's, if I did not do what he wanted) and I moved.


Thank you Crissi for the beautiful signature
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tilly
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Posttilly on Tue Sep 19, 2017 12:56 pm

Marie, I used to dream of Milo, it was strangely comforting. Maybe you will too.
I agree, its so hard when someone you love needs help but wont accept it. Sadly, there is nothing you can do. That sounds very scary Marie, Parents do have a lot to answer for sometimes.
Nikki, I went to Almyrida in Crete. It is such a lovely place, been there many times.
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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Tue Sep 19, 2017 1:02 pm

When I was hitch hiking I seen and heard a lot of things..and realized that there are so many people in the world that is worse off than me..

I shouldn't complain because of that reason..but it does hurt..and when I read all the things that others are going through on here then I know my life isn't as bad off as so many others..and I feel for each and everyone of you.. consol1

I
think we all need a VERY BIG hugss right about now..

I love each and everyone of you so much..your my family valentine1f

We also need a very big GROUP HUG

grouphug



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

Broomhilda's Sims2
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Friends call me Sam(F) or Broomy or Broomhilda
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LoWiSa
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PostLoWiSa on Tue Sep 19, 2017 4:05 pm

Oh Samantha, I had no idea about your daughter... I'm sorry to hear about it. It can not be compared with addiction, but the principle is the same. If you persuade yourself that the problem does not exist, you can not solve it ... sad, but true...
It will be my honor to be part of this chain. I'm absolutely okay with it. Thank you dear Sam :Val10:

Suzanne, thank you for you supportive words... healing is long and contains painful memories, it'll take some time for sure but we're be both alright and one day we will forgive our parents their treatment and everything. I believe it...
I have Skype, but... I don't think it's a good idea. My english is not that way good to speak. I'm okay with writing and understanding the written words, but still... not speaking good :)

I discover very touching song lately. Its words can be likened to the troubles we are talking about here. Very moving and beautiful. Listen to it, you'll see by yourself, I listen to it over and over again... Million reasons from Lady Gaga ♥️

~ ~ ~

Let's not just talk about sad things...
I just made my first default replacement for clothing ever!!! :wohoo: :wohoo: :wohoo:
I so excited about it. I forgot to take a picture but it's working and looking just p e r f e c t l y.
I did defaults for maxis maternity clothing. I always wanted to have mix&match; each outfit different. Marja did the first ones I seen it just wasn't exactly what I wanted. I used different tutorial than hers, but it was she who inspired me to do my own.
I plan to do all nine victory

Good night and sweet dreams grouphug







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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Tue Sep 19, 2017 6:17 pm

Thank you Anna cutehug I will let my sister know..

```````````````````````````````````````````````````

Did you all hear about the 7.1 Earthquake in Mexico and when I first heard about it there was 3 confirmed dead..so sad..and then there is Maria...going to hit Peru head on at Cat 5..and most of those Islands around it..and just after Irma going through there..what a year..

2018 is just around the corner and I hope and pray that it's a better year than 2017..



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

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Friends call me Sam(F) or Broomy or Broomhilda
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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Wed Sep 20, 2017 7:54 am

This is going to be the longest day of my 56 years..omgosh

*Well went to bed early..around 10 10:30 last night..couldn't sleep..got up found a roach crawling on the wall..
*Then finished up a few recolors and got them posted for downloading lol
*It was like just after 6 am this morning before I got to bed
*John woke me up because Frances can't handle 3 dogs just 2 so I have to watch Beast..figured we would put Shya and Beast together in the small bedroom and all will be well..nope
*Had to give them rawhide bones so they wouldn't destroy anything..big mistake
*Beast ate his and went after Shya's now Shya isn't a vicious dog but she would fight for that bone..she usually plays outside with Beast so figured they would get along..omgosh
*To top all this off it's not even 10 am..and I'm so tired..

May lay down for a power nap of an hour to see if that works..



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

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Lorry
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PostLorry on Wed Sep 20, 2017 3:54 pm

I hope you get some rest Sam consol1


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szanne7000
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Postszanne7000 on Thu Sep 21, 2017 1:14 am

Anna - I'd still skype with you :D We'd just have to type in the words and use the translator on Google, LOL!

I do understand though :D

Also, I love that song by Lady Gaga! It is so poignant.

I also agree, Sam...

hugss for everyone!

Sam - sad news, over 250 dead in Mexico and Puerto Rico has zero electrical power from its grid... the only electricity available there is from generators. The news stated that while some may get their power back within two weeks, it might be six months before it all gets restored.

The Leeward Islands took another big hit, too, before Maria went on to Puerto Rico...

...the good news? It looks like it will go North away from the East Coast and then veer off back into the Atlantic - it is still wait and see, though, for what the winds and rain from the outer bands may do further up the coast... Here's sending truly positive thoughts in that direction <3

Any more news on a new place, Sam? (I hope you get rested, too!)



Thank you, Crissi, for my beautiful signature <3
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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Thu Sep 21, 2017 10:08 am

I am glad your feeling a bit better..Suzanne..and continue getting some rest..that is the most important part of the flu..and fluids.. budhug

The internet/cable service went out yesterday between 12 and 1 or 2 or something like that..anyway by 4 pm I went to lay down and didn't wake up till 7 pm..bathroom break, smoke and back to bed till almost 10 pm..same thing..then back to bed..woke up 2 times in the middle of the night same thing then back to bed didn't wake up till almost 9 am..feeling a bit better but have to clean house..Madysin will be here tomorrow and of course Tanaja and Taniya will be here as well..lol

I think I have found a place..waiting on a call back for a ride..Terry found a place about a half a block from his..there are 2 apartments..one is a studio..that means no bedroom..and the other is a 2 bedroom..both the same price..while I am looking at them..I will call Mandy and see what she says on each of them and go from there..Terry took pictures and they don't look to bad..they are clean..and the apartments are not on a hill and no steps they are both downstairs..so we will see..I will let you all know when this happens..

I went ahead and made more phone calls here in Boonville but no luck with anything available right away..

I know that is so tragic on Mexico omgosh..and all those children..and they are still looking for children..and then with Maria hitting Puerto Rico omgosh..getting hit twice with those hurricanes..

That Jose may not have hit the Northeast but that storm surge and flooding is a very bad thing for the coast line..

Be safe everyone that is in the path of all of these storms..thinking of each and everyone of you SummerB2 music1



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

Broomhilda's Sims2
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Friends call me Sam(F) or Broomy or Broomhilda
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szanne7000
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Postszanne7000 on Thu Sep 21, 2017 8:12 pm

I need to correct the number of fatalities - I though 250, and as of yesterday it was 230 - still very sad...

...good news, they've located all the children from the collapsed school. I did not see if alive or not... it hurts.

I'm happy it looks like you've found the right place - can't wait to hear more <3



Thank you, Crissi, for my beautiful signature <3
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Tahoe
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PostTahoe on Mon Sep 25, 2017 1:19 pm

My husband managed to get rid of the half of the thumb yesterday, ohno at the hospital they saw that he had managed to cut the tendon also after surgery so the arm and thumb are plastered as it should be for 2 months he is already beginning to worry about what he will do the whole days. So he's going to walk around here for 2 months. We came to be mad at each other.
Now we have decided that we will go on vacation next summer and we will travel to Canada, Vancouver where we will rent a 3-week mobile car, we will be in British Columbia and Alberta. Is there anyone living there who can bring some tips. We ask for prices for food if it costs entry to national parks and so on. We also need to buy something cheap with a table and chairs to have an outdoor, where you buy that cheap. All tips are received


Thank you Crissi for the beautiful signature
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Samantha61
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PostSamantha61 on Mon Sep 25, 2017 1:26 pm

WHAT Marie..what happened..I didn't know your husband was even hurt..omgosh girl..

I have been to Canada before back in 2004..it is very expensive..at least for me it was..I traveled around with a group of people and if it wasn't for them I wouldn't have eaten lol..they wouldn't let me buy my meals..they are so sweet up there..and funny omgosh I just love, love Canadians lol..and I miss the group I was with..lost their phone numbers and all..one was from Vancouver..I spent a week with them then went to Prince Rupert for 3 days before the boat came and took me to Alaska..

If I was still hitch hiking I would join you both up there hehe..



Thank you so much Crissi, it's beautiful
~hugs and smiles my dear, dear BFF's~
I am so proud of all of you..
valentine1f

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Friends call me Sam(F) or Broomy or Broomhilda
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Lorry
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PostLorry on Mon Sep 25, 2017 4:21 pm

Oh my gosh Marie how awful for your husband, I am so sorry.

Wow From Bad comes good! How wonderful that you are going on a holiday to Canada, the people are so nice there.


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szanne7000
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Postszanne7000 on Mon Sep 25, 2017 4:37 pm

Hi Marie - I'm so sorry about your husband. Hopefully, all will be well as long as he does what the doctors tell him.

About Canada - I have a friend who lives in Vancouver and I've passed your questions on to her to see if she can assist with information. :D

I'll let you know once I hear from her <3



Thank you, Crissi, for my beautiful signature <3
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Chicklet45368
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PostChicklet45368 on Mon Sep 25, 2017 5:10 pm

OMG Marie! That's horrible! How did he do that!!!  And yes, being in pain makes your temper flair and you take it out on those around you, but it's nice that you guys made up and now are planning a wonderful trip!

I have never been out of the US besides a short day trip to Mexico, so I'm of no help with costs and what to do. But it's exciting to look forward to it and to plan it!


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